Zombies on Fire
It was a regular day on Mount Olympus. Poseidon was sharpening his trident, Ares and Athena were discussing wars down on earth, and Demeter was eating oatmeal. Suddenly, there was a huge crash.
“Zeus and Hera must be fighting again,” said Poseidon. The other gods nodded in agreement. Suddenly, Hermes ran into the hall.
“Zombies are attacking! Zombies are attacking!” Ares and Athena jumped out of their seats, eager for a fight. Suddenly, a horde of zombies began to pour into the hall behind Hermes. Poseidon pushed Hermes out of the way and pointed his trident threateningly at the horde. The zombies stopped where they were and their leader emerged from the crowd to address the gods.
“Who are you?” demanded Poseidon.
“Sumus zombies et nos venimus ab terra!” said the zombie leader.
“What do you want?” asked Demeter.
“Volumus esse cerebrum Athenae!” The zombies all said together.
“Why?” asked Poseidon, alarmed.
“Quia zombies hebes sunt. Post essemus cerebrum, erimus intellegentes!”
“But why my brain?” demanded Athena.
“Tu dea sapentiae es. Cerebrum deae sapentiae nobis sapentiam maximam dabit.”
“Who sent you?” asked Ares.
“Hades dominus noster est.”
“You can’t eat my brains!” yelled Athena. “Charge!” the gods began to cut down the zombies. Ares fought very well and killed 10 zombies before he heard a scream.
“Ahhhh!” Demeter cried. A zombie was eating her leg. Ares pulled it off her, but it was too late. A vacant expression clouded her features.
“Iam, sum zombie. Volo… cerebra!” said Demeter. The other gods were horrified.
“Cum potestate deorum, nos terram totam occupabimus!” called the zombie leader.
Suddenly, Zeus appeared and hurled a huge lightning bolt at the horde.
“Thanks, Zeus!” said Poseidon.
Suddenly an unearthly shriek pierced the air. “Uror! Mihi auxilium date! Uror!” cried a zombie. Zeus’s lightning bolt had ignited his rotting flesh. Suddenly, the burning zombie crumbled to ashes.
“I think their weakness is fire!” Ares called to the other gods. Hearing this, Zeus threw 3 more lightning bolts at the mass of zombies. Because they were packed so tightly, the fire spread quickly. The gods stood back and admired Zeus’s handiwork.
“Vos non vicistis!” said the zombie leader. “Zombies non potest vinci!” but he, too, collapsed into a pile of ashes.
“What about Demeter?” asked Athena.
“Whoops,” replied Zeus.
“Who’s gonna clean up all these ashes?” asked Ares, after all the zombies were gone.
“I got it,” answered Hestia.