The Zombie Invasion of Rome

by Max

Since the early days of Rome on the last day of the year the people of Rome climbed to the top of Palatine hill to sacrifice their finest animals, and food. Though many sacrifices were made to the Gods, this specific sacrifice was made to Pluto, the god of death. On the year 222 terrible storms ravaged through Rome destroying homes and crops. Though Ceres allowed for abundant grain supply, Romans were still hungry, and unhappy. At the end of the year, emperor Julius III exclaimed “triginta unus de december est, hostiae est neccese.” Julius III sent a group of romans up Palantine hill to sacrifice food and animals. This expedition was lead by Perseus, a Roman hero that had killed Medusa and accomplished many other feats. Unfortunately it got dark, and storms began to gather on the mountain. Perseus said “nox est, hostia non esse possibile” The Romans did not reach the mountain and the sacrifice was not made.

Pluto awaited his sacrifice on his throne in the underworld. Pluto had always had a bad temper, and the thirst for Roman blood. For years Pluto awaited an opportunity to attack the Romans. As the night wore on, and his sacrifice did not arrive, he became increasingly upset, and aggressive. An opportunity finally arose to attack the people of Rome, however, Pluto would not attack the Romans himself, he would form an undead army. Pluto gathered 1,000 of the most vicious souls from tartarus. Pluto promised that if they attacked Rome they would be released from tartarus. Pluto said “Mortuis surget et Oppugnare Roma.” Thus the undead rose into the fields outside Rome chanting “Nos bibemus Sanguis Romae.” The first town that the undead attacked was Pompeii, after the walls were breached, Pompeii was burnt to the ground killing thousands of romans. The undead were invulnerable to arrows, and roman weapons. An undead soldier with an arrow in his chest chanted “fortabis , nos periculosum sunt.”

After thousands of Romans were left dead in the streets, all the Gods were displeased. Jupiter, the king of the gods called a meeting of all the gods at Mount Olympus. Mars suggested that the Romans should wage war with the dead. However, Roman weapons did not hurt the undead. Apollo, a renowned archer suggested a solution. “dabo saggitas deorum ad romanae” Mercurius delivered hundreds of these arrows to Julius III. Julius III assembled an army to engage the undead. He told them “ populus romanae defindire et conequor Victoria.” Perseus lead this Roman force. All the romans carried arrows of Apollo into battle. The Roman force assembled outside the walls of Rome awaiting the undead attack. As the undead approached, Perseus Shouted “Alia iacta est” there is no turning back. The battle lasted three days. After all the undead were killed only one hundred Romans remained. Perseus was exhausted, yet triumphant. “sic semper tyrannis.” So loud that Hades could hear. The undead were finally gone.

Back at Mount Olympus, Zeus banished Hades from the council of the gods for 1,000 years. Zeus warned Hades “ Non venit ad Olympus non sum salutatio.” As promised, Hades did not return to Rome for 1,000 years. Thus concludes the first zombie war of Rome.

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