An uprising

by silas
(not rome)

Something Peculiar


Something was rotten in the state of Rome. The gods were angry but that was hardly new. The source of their anger was quite extraordinary; the dead were in rebellion. Their leader, Orpheus had cast Pluto into the depths of Tarturus with the Titians. They freed Prometheus and Orpheus lead them from the Underworld on the path he walked before. The gods were a trifle annoyed by this uprising and prepared to go to battle to defeat it. Jupiter, the king of the gods, called on his many sons to come to battle at his side; only Hercules responded in the affirmative. The Olympians stepped onto the ground at the south of the Rubicon. Neptune called out to Orpheus: “Salve, non ambulas in Rubico, mortuis tuis sed in Tarturus tui venis.” Neptune crated a wall of water which Jupiter electrified.

But Julius Caesar responded “Transii flumen olim, ego hodie transibit iterum.”

Jupiter: “Parati estote! In tarturum ibis.”
Mars charged across the Rubicon and was killed nearly immediately by the electrified water. The zombies swarmed him moaning, “cerebella.” When they opened up Mars’s head, the zombies were quite disappointed by the lack of gray matter. The battle raged and Hercules destroyed many a zombie. But he was soon captured by Julius Ceaser and Prometheus.

Juluis: “Cur tu pugnas cum deos?”

Prometheus: “Deos est improbe.”

Herecules: “Tu es minima, deos est totam.”

Julius : “Herecules, deos est non totam, tu es baceolum.”

Prometheus : “Tu pugnas sed iupiter solo dicit non pugnat.”

Hercules: “Veritas, Iupitier est sine decore.”

Promethus: “oh Hercule, veritas est. Humanes est probe. Sed, deos est improbes Iupitero.”
Hercules dicit “ Est! Iupiter est improbissimo!“

Hercules was summarily released and went to kill Jupiter. Jupiter killed Hercules but was weakened to the point where Prometheus could kill him. Prometheus then took his seat as king of the gods and released Neptune from his imprisonment. The zombies returned to the underworld to be hailed as heroes and were taken to the Elysian Fields. Julius Ceaser was given immortality and took Mars’s place as the god of war. Prometheus gave many a secret to humanity that Jupiter had withheld and the gods became happier than ever. The land prospered and the gods were good. All was right.

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